The Ego

The Ego

"The divide between good and evil runs through the heart of every man" -Alexander Solzhenitsyn

Buddhism brought forth an understanding of the Ego, as a form of "lesser self," that lives in every human being. This lesser self can sometimes appear strong, though its thoughts are rooted in fear. 

There is also a true, or "higher self" that resides within us all. The Ego, like the higher self, dwells in our consciousness. The Ego uses the same voice, inside our heads, as our true/higher self; it is hard to discern which is speaking to you. 

Ego: Deceitful, clever, malevolent, selfish, paranoid, untruthful, impatient.

Higher self: Honest, empathetic, intelligent, aware, confident.

Buddhists use meditation, chanting, mindfulness, and a bunch of other tools to become aware of the Ego. 

The general idea is to quiet your mind, create some mental space, and when you sense the Ego, learn to let go. Don't waste your time thinking, plotting revenge, or ruminating on how you have been wronged. Just focus on your breathing or chanting, or just remain present within the moment.

The only way past it, is through it.

I have found that proper breath takes you out of your head: It directs more attention to breath from your chest. The Ego resides in the mind, not the heart.

But be vigilant: The Ego is a slippery, decitefull, conniving presence. Even one that is enlightened can easily be tempted by the ego. In fact, continual denial of the Ego is a great part of becoming enlightened. 

Someone who is enlightened brings forth speech and action that reflect the value of the higher self. 

Buddhism had also produced profound philosophy that helps one navigate the Ego, extend empathy to others, and deal with the unavoidable suffering that life can bring.

If you pay attention to your thoughts with enough objectivity, you will become aware of their source. 

Humans have an immense capacity for both good and evil; it depends on whether we allow our ego or our true self to control our thoughts, words, and actions. 

One should never underestimate one's own capacity for true evil. It lays salient inside all human beings, just waiting for attention.

Open your eyes and observe the damage that your ego causes to both yourself and others. Learn to act in a way that makes things better rather than worse.

Be vigilant. The Ego always has another plan. 

Vocal Tone

Vocal tone is something we can't see, but only hear. Because of this, it's importance is sometimes lost.

Be fooled not by it's lack of visibility.

There is a great deal of information that is communicated via vocal tone about the social power hierarchy.

Try to become more aware of the vocal tone that people use when they address you.

Ask yourself:

Is this person using the appropriate volume?

Do you sense anger or stress in their voice?

People can often change their words, but the tone reveals the conflict.

If you observe an incongruence, address it. Ask: "Why are they speaking so loud?", or, "What is stressing them?"

This simple act can make you experience less subordination.

Imagine volume and stress along a scale of 1-10. If someone starts the conversation at 4 or higher, you must address it. Unless, of course, the situation merits it.

You can address it by simply (and genuinely) asking them if they are okay. 

It is generally not socially acceptable to speak loud, or emotionally, without good cause.

Gently pointing this out (with proper vocal tone of your own) should subdue the aggression a bit.

This technique works amazingly well with children: By resetting the volume and stress, you are recalibrating the energy behind their speech.

If you are unable to get the person you are interacting with to lower their vocal tone, it is in your best interest to not engage.

Ironically, strong politicians, actors, and sales people actually lower their voices when revealing something.

If you are in a position of power, people tend to lean towards you when you lower your voice.

When people tell secrets, they lower their voice; secrets are considered valuable.

You can use this to your advantage by lowering you voice as you reveal an especially interesting part of the story, or the lesson you wish to pass on.

This blog is just scratching the surface with vocal tone. This will be one of the first things I discuss on the Blunted Buddha podcast. /bluntedbuddha.com